Husband doesn’t want mediation

My husband moved out 5 months ago, and after some procrastination from me, I have finally got round to petitioning for divorce.

We are on amicable terms and both manage well in our 2 separate homes.

I have suggested mediation as neither of us want to go to court and we are on friendly terms. However, he has just shocked me by ringing up and saying he doesn’t want mediation, but wants us to sit down and work out an arrangement between ourselves (it’ll be the cost that’s putting him off).

Our finances are slightly complicated by the fact that the house he now lives in, was bought outright with a combination of some of his savings (which were an inheritance from his dad) plus our joint savings and investments. He says therefore it is ringfenced and I cannot put his house into the pot. He also wants 50% of the FMH which I’m still living in, with our 3 children, but says I can stay here until the youngest is 18 (she’s 11 now).

I obviously don’t agree with this and think mediation would help. What can I do if he refuses? How can I get him to go and what happens if he doesn’t?

His idea of what’s fair will be very different from mine and he can become unpleasant when things don’t go his way. So I’m also nervous about not having a 3rd party there.

Any advice gratefully accepted!