Child Welfare Hearing Begins

I have a hearing to attend tomorrow. I dont really know what to expect in terms of the outcome.

To be honest I dont hold much hope in the system. Even if I get a contact order I imagine that the ex will still play silly games to try to make it as impossible as possible for me to be a dad to my son.

I got this far in the system due to my crazy ex for no aparent reason deciding to drag me into a Inderdict situation. I think that its either an attempt to keep me away from my son and/or to hit me in the pocket.

The crazy part about the inderdict action is that I have factual evidence of abuse from her, which I choose not to act on as I dont think that its in my sons best interests. Were as she has made up lies and got her sister to also lie on her behalf. I was extremely disapointed by the sister as we would normally get on fine.

My last hearing was about the interdict were the ex was seeking power of arrest, to be honest I was bricking it. I could imagine with that power she would really make my life hell and I would probably as a result loose the job I have got, the same Job that has taken me around 12 years to work towards.

At the hearing it was music to my ears to hear her solicitor saying that they would no longer be seaking the power of arrest, I have no clue why, but im not complaining.

My solicitor actually requested at the last hearing that the judge would consider holding a child welfare hearing at the I think "proof" for the inderdict situation, and I think now both are being tagged together. Aparently this will save me some money, which I am glad about as it all costs so much money.

I feel that I have to unfortunately stick to trying to arrange for my pickups from a contact center, Its hard to come to that conclusion as it will in affect cut my contact time down quite a bit from what had been previously agreed, but I dont want to spend any more unnecassary days in a prison cell, at the whim of the ex and I could not afford to loose my job, I would be devistated.

So I dont know really what to expect to come out of this hearing, I hope that the judge supports my view that I should get contact with my son again, I hope he\she sees my way with regards to my reasons for a contact center use, I hope to see my son again after another 4 months gone by without him bringing my total non contact time to over a year .....

Any general advice about the next steps from welfare hearing onwards will be gratefully recieved.

Thanks for reading

stilladad,

Probably not the best and timed out information....however... I found that sitting in an ante room whilst sols coerced us to reach a contact agreement that suited the courts was in the best interests of NO member of our family..lhave your say!

E

I know what you mean.

I have allready had a disscusion with my current lawyer that pretty much ended in I am paying to instruct you, not the other way around. I used a bit more diplomatic language at the time to get my point accross.

People need to be careful not to feel pressured by anyone into acting in a way that they are not happy about.

My first lawyer convinced me into accepting various conditions that I was unhappy about and to be honest all it really done was give me a constant source of additional stress.

Its my view that you should take time to consider views and opinions but you must go with it the way you want to. Its what helps me sleep at night anyway.

Court Update:
Well I had my hearing today. I have to say it was a fairly unpleasant experiance.

I did not expect to feel just as upset and annoyed at the sight of the ex.

After all the abuse and the carry on with the police and court involvment due to her nonsense.

It was difficult to remain focused on what was going on and to try to remain as emotional free as I normally manage in situations talking to people I dont know (Usually a daily thing for me with my type of work)

Anyway, that said. The hearing consisted of me, the ex, the 2 lawyers and Judge and 2 clerks.

All women, I did feel a bit intimidated I have to admit.

Anyway again, after some nonsense debating my suggestions for resolution.

I got an order to pick my son up on a sunday, I pick him up from a neutral venue. Not the contact center as its not open on a sunday here. But in a situation were I think I should have protection from the false claims and personal abuse.

So on reflection I am really looking forward to sunday after 4 months in exile.

My order, at least on paper has some previous insane restrictions removed. Though still to be tested in practice.

I did find the experiance of the judge a bit daunting, I had a general sense of "If you really wanted to see your kid, you would agree" and it was hard to be honest to not feel compelled just to agree to things that I dont want. E.g picking him up from homes were people have been involved in threats and false claims etc.

Anyway the Ex made a mess of that one, as when quizzed about why she could not entertain the idea of a neutral location on any day at the weekend, she collapased into more obvious lies, so poor that the judge even commented on her just being difficult. And almost feel of her seat at the further attempts to convince everyone in the room it was true, I think everyone else there was equally embarresed by the stupidity.

So the story continues. Even if I get just one more day its worth the money, he will know I am still out there. I am just glad at the moment I can afford it........

Any questions about the procedure etc feel free to post or pm if it makes it easier for you.

Well done. It's a first step in the right direction. Courts just happen to think that when children live with one parent they should see and know the other unless the circumstances are very exceptional. There is no reason why contact can't be gradually increased.

Was a date set for another Child Welfare Hearing?

There is to be a review of the current arrangement in June.

I expect that something will trigger an attempt to change matters. Perhaps I might comment incorrectly on the weather or something.

But will make best use of the time.

I cant imagine that there will be any reasonable evidence to warrant a change, so I am hopefull in that respect.

I just dont know what hope I have in the system punishing if necassary if there is a sustained breach. But we shall see.

Thanks for your comments.

There is every possibility contact will be increased in June. Keep a contact diary and record any difficulties. One or two hiccoughs are only to be expected but there is a limit to the number of excuses that can be used before they become implausible.

No matter how you feel remember the purpose of court orders is to benefit children, not punish parents.